On Saturday 5th December the second round of the IBL (Irish Bouldering League) had reached Dublin City University, and it was a competition that touched the hearts of many....yeah bollox...It was good..not THAT good.

Order was restored as the number of sessions went down from three to just the one. Each competitor was given two and a half hours to do 20 problems, graded from 4c to 6b. Yes indeed, the problems were graded this time. Can this be??? DCU has a moulded wall with lots of features as well as the usual number of holds. This made a more "technical" competition as competitors had to smear and crimp on very small features. So the problems were graded...But what else did the organizers of the event ever do for us??

Bananas. There was a whole box full to the brim of Chiquita bananas. Lovely yellow, bendy bananas....In fact not only was there one box, there was two. Several attempts were made by climbers to put the skins on the routes that Conor Burns was trying, but the banana skin lacked the Stealth C4 rubber that a Five10 climbing shoe has. The plan failed miserably. So the organizers have given us graded boulder problems and bananas...But what else did the organizers ever do for us??

Free t-shirts to anyone who judged!?....After the author had completed his time the problems the offer of free t-shirts was too much. Admittedly after 3 hours of judging the novelty of getting a free t-shirt had worn off...but it's the thought that counts right?? So the organizers gave us graded boulder problems, bananas and free t-shirts....But what ELSE did the organizers ever do for us??

Well...they had a good selection of music, plus they employed the voluntary services of the Rooney brothers to set up the routes!! Hmm...good music..that's cool....but the Rooney brothers?? Well, let's face facts, the problems were good. How good you might ask?? Well, they weren't the least bit stretchy which was great...bar one (Route #2) which was a big dyno at the end for those who have height impediments. There was also nice warm up routes to get the body moving which was a great help and confidence booster to most people. So the organizers had grades, bananas, free t-shirts, good music, good problem setting....BUT..What else did they ever do for us??

There was no queues...Can you believe it??...Well virtually no queues in comparison to UCD's 2nd session misery. Special thanks to the organizers of the first round in UCD for completely screwing it up, and getting Michael Duffy to demoralize most people to such an extent that they didn't turn up at the 2nd round. Okay...so grades, bananas, t-shirts, music, the Rooney brothers and no queues...but what else DID they ever DO for us???

They paid the locals to come into the slipper to entertain us with a minor pub brawl...although admittedly that was kind of scarey with headbutting and the throwing of ashtrays, tables and chairs....Don't worry folks they shook hands afterwards on a job well done. But WHAT ELSE DID THEY EVER DO FOR US ???

Well there was the really good prizes (including spot prizes)....and there was lots of free drink afterwards....and.... Ahh fuck off.

What of the competition you might ask? Well, pretty much same old, same old. Michael Duffy won the Male A; Conor Burns, proving that he's far too good to be in Male B, taking the honours in Male B; and Joan Flanagan winning the Female section.

In fairness, Conor Burns decided at the start of the competition to donate his prize to someone lower down the table in the Male B. I guess he will have to continue that tradition until he goes into Male A next year. "What happens when you pull the short stick?". Well you should know Conor. See ya in Galway!?

Glynn Foster (5/12/98)